Living for Now

Forgetting what is behind, [we will] press on toward the goal. Phil 3:14

This moment is all we have. We are not promised the next breath, and yet we live most of our lives regretting the past and worrying about the future. Yesterday is long gone, and tomorrow may never come… how can we live with so much more than these daily fears and anxieties? How can we make now better?

“Living for now” gets a bad rap. It can sound a lot like “living for self,” but let’s explore what the Word says…

“Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34
“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; NOW it springs forth! Do you not perceive it?” Isaiah 43:18-19

We make more trouble for ourselves today by digging up the past and fearing what will happen in the future when the Bible tells us to do neither. Sometimes our minds are so trapped by this cycle that we can only imagine the worst!

A troubling thought: “I ruined my children’s lives by choosing to quit homeschooling them. I sacrificed my children for my own selfish desires. Now their lives will not turn out how they were supposed to and I am to blame.”

This is a thought that has taunted me for years, but do you know that God is proving me wrong nearly every single day? I bet you would find that He is proving your troubling thoughts wrong, as well. If we will change the atmosphere of our minds and train ourselves to seek out even the smallest ways God is working on our behalf, then we will begin to recognize all the BIG ways we may have been missing all along.

A brief homeschooling share: I decided to put my children in public school after homeschooling them for seven years. The truth of the matter is that I was completely overwhelmed by adding our third child to the mix, I felt alone in the homeschooling process, and I didn’t know what to do to make it any better.  For these reasons, I didn’t want to do it anymore, so I gave up.  I threw in the towel, come what may.  If I’m being honest, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I have seen my children bloom and excel in public school with opportunities I personally could never have afforded them, but right or wrong, there have been times that I deeply doubted my decision.  

(Side note: If you are struggling with homeschooling, don’t go it alone like I did just trying to make it work. Find some outside help. There is a huge homeschooling community, especially in my local state, and they will be overjoyed to help you find solutions and relationships that will keep you refreshed, empowered, and on-track for the journey.)

Letting go of past regrets is not an easy thing to do. We feel culpable… like we’re to blame… and we feel like we should be punished because we can’t fix it. No one else can punish us for those times when we believe we let everyone down, so we punish ourselves.

“Why did I do that? I caused this future outcome with that past decision! I’m a horrible, worthless person because of that decision.”

And the cycle continues…

“What else will happen in the future because of my horrible decision? God probably won’t help me because I failed Him. He will probably punish me in some way! I deserve to worry and to kick myself for the rest of my life.”

You would never say those things to me about my homeschooling decisions. You would probably say, “Don’t beat yourself up! You did the best you could! There are some superstar teachers in public school!” If you wouldn’t say horrible things to me and beat me up for my decisions, then why would you do it to yourself? Do you think your friends would beat you up for your mistakes, or would they be kind and forgiving?

Do you feel that I deserve to be kicked and punished all the rest of my days for sending my kids to public school? Do you really believe that my decision will ruin my children’s lives forever and that God cannot assist in any way? I’m sure you’re thinking, “No, not at all!”

I would never even think those things about anyone else. In fact, if I heard anyone saying my “troubling thoughts” to anyone else, I would very physically stand up and very vocally defend the victim of those bullying statements! Why would I not do that for myself?

Well, I have… and I do. And I hope you do, too!

A Much Better Way to Live

Forget the former things and don’t fear the future. If we give up on those two things, how then will we live? What are we to do?

Let go of the past and don’t worry about the future. The mistakes you made in the past gave you wisdom for today. They are the very things that created the beautiful person you see in the mirror before you. Own them. Look those regrets in the face with some attitude and say, “Yep, I did that, what of it?” You can’t change it, so just trust that “God works all things together for the GOOD of those who love Him…” (Romans 8:28). His promises are true. Make your future about loving God and you can’t go wrong.
Goals, Plans, and Preparations – I can’t possibly live with joy today if I have procrastinated all the days before… (I know this from all my former years of being a professional procrastinator.) And how will I know where to steer my boat today if I have no map or rudder to keep me on course? We can’t just willy-nilly flip-flop our way through each day and call it “living for now.” That’s not biblical, either.

The Bible process of planning for the future is to 1) Receive wise counsel (Prov 15:22), 2) Plan your way (Prov 16:9), and 3) Commit your work unto the Lord (Prov 16:3). If we do things God’s way, then those same verses tell us that our plans will be established and the Lord will direct our steps.

Once our work is committed to the Lord, we can “look to the ant” for how to engage in our daily activities. The ant is super hardworking (not lazy), he is no procrastinator, and he is ready in season and out of season (Prov 6:6-8).
Find Balance – Work hard today. Do your best. But find the balance between working hard and self-harm:
1. I want my house to be neat and clean, but I will not be a slave to perfectionism, so I will do five things every day to maintain a standard that I have decided is acceptable for my family, without comparing my life to anyone else’s. Mine are laundry, dishes, trash, bedroom, and bathrooms. When these are out of whack, so am I.
2. On the other hand, my plate is full with life events and the areas of service I believe the Lord has put on my heart to do. Sometimes it’s a lot to deal with, especially during concert, marching band, and graduation seasons! I’m not willing to let go of these areas of service, so I must manage my time well. Most importantly, I must continue to be faithful in the “small things” of doing my “daily five” at home, getting plenty of rest, taking my meds and drinking my water, and staying connected with my family. If my life is going to be more busy on the outside, then I need to be even more intentional in my internal private life… otherwise, what kind of foundation am I really standing on?
Trust God with the Outcomes – we must do what we know is right to do (anything else is a sin according to James 4:17) and let God do the rest. Once I have done my best, I must keep myself from worrying about whether or not things will turn out how I want them to. Funnily enough, it’s often best when they don’t.

We can always fall back on the truth that God knows the plans He has for us (Jeremiah 29:11), and He is faithful to work them out on our behalf (Psalm 138:8). We can keep our eyes on Jesus and refuse to let anything hold us back. We can learn to manage ourselves so we are not wasting time, and we will make goals, but not just our own!

“Forgetting what is behind, [we will] press on toward the goal to win the prize of the upward calling of Christ” (Phil 3:14). What is He calling you to do today? Find that and you will find abundant LIFE.